Fulltime Mama My name is Elizabeth, and I am the happy wife of ten years to Fabio and fulltime mama to four beautiful children: Joshua-9, Dominique 7, Israel- almost 5, Johann-3 and expecting a new baby in April 2012! We are currently living in Brazil as missionaries and life never ceases to be an adventure!!! I love motherhood with a passion and am passionate about providing a place here at MamaKnowsBest where mothers can learn, grow, and share ... pooling the wisdom of many into one big jackpot for mothers. View all articles | Contact author

My Method of Potty Training- Relaxed and Simple

I really don’t have a real high-tech or well thought out strategy for potty training my children, but as I was counseling a first-time mom through a potty crisis a couple weeks ago, I thought a few points might be worth writing about.

I have done infant potty training with all of my children. That works great when they are little. They just seem to know to go when held over a receptacle. It is truly amazing! However, for my babies at least, they quit wanting to go somewhere around 8-10 months or so…. (Haven’t figured out how to overcome that one yet. Tips welcome!)

So I eventually have to go though the official removal of diapers once they are toddling about.  Let me say here that I am a fan of early potty training, as in somewhere between 18 months to 2 years, for many reasons which I will not expound on here.  When they get to that age, and it is a convenient time for me (no family vacations coming up, etc.), I just take their (cloth) diapers off.   

I try to start at a time when I am going to be mostly home for a few days so we can work on it. I don’t do “boot camp” style potty training, although I wish I did! Maybe next time. But so far, I have taken a fairly relaxed approach. I just start setting the child on the potty. I try to get them to sit there for as long as it takes until they tinkle. Read them a book, or whatever.  The sound of running water often speeds things up too. :-)

That first time we “catch a pee” is always monumental!  We sing and dance and make a big hoopla of it!  Then I put the child in training pants. (NO pull-ups!!)  And I continue to take the child as often as necessary – like every 20 minutes or so to begin with, in an effort to avoid accidents on the floor. I sometimes set a timer so I remember to take the child again.

Eventually that accident will happen (probably sooner rather than later!).  Take it as a good opportunity to teach. Have the child help you wipe it up and say in a calm tone, “Oh, this was a no-no. We want to go potty in the toilet now that you are such a big boy/girl!”

Repeat, repeat, repeat.

This is usually fun for the child in the beginning, while they are learning a new skill. But, it seems that they eventually get tired of it and start to resist.  This is when I start offering rewards. I guess you could call it a bribe, and I am definitely not a fan of bribing your children to do anything, but I guess I make a small exception for potty issues. Hehe. I have used stickers, raisins, etc.  This can be highly motivating!!

TWO MAJOR POINTS THAT OFTEN STRESS OUT POTTY TRAINING MOMS

One: Don’t be afraid of putting your child back in a diaper when you are going to go out. It really is OKAY!  I was so afraid with my first child that I was going to confuse him and then we would have to backtrack, etc, but I have come to think it really is okay and children are resilient. So, if you have a long car ride or a day at the zoo or whatever, do what you can, take them to the bathroom when you can, but don’t stress about having them in diapers again for the day, when you are still in the early stages of potty training.

Two: I have heard many express frustrations about their child not telling them when they have to go. I can relate. My first child would *always* go when I took him, and if I took him often enough, he would stay dry, but I didn’t think he was really trained, because he would never tell me when he had to go!  I got so frustrated about the fact that he wouldn’t tell me that I just put him back in diapers for a week, after quite a while without them!  Well, I have changed my thinking on this one too! I have found that most children are capable of staying dry as long as you take them potty often enough, but will NOT tell you they have to go for a couple of months after training starts. I would imagine this is especially true when you are training the under 2 years old crowd.  Don’t lose heart or give up. You are still training your child, to want to feel dry, to get used to going in the toilet, etc. He or she will start telling you soon!

NIGHT TIME TRAINING

It is good to begin limiting drinks after dinnertime, and only allowing water in the evening. I have also found it helpful to take them 3-4 times in the last hour before bed to make sure they get as much out as possible! However, in my experience, they will night train when they are ready and not any sooner.  I had one that night trained before day training!  And, the other two took quite a few months after day training to begin staying dry at night.  Again, don’t stress about putting a diaper on for sleep times. It is okay and they will get it eventually.